Nice plot development here is so few words, and the way you've written this story, it makes the reader go back and review it a few times to truly get the meaning. Very well done! I see why this won!
I hate the term drabble (always have) but I really like the story. Great example of what can be accomplished in a microfiction with some effort and imagination.
I remember back in the Medium days people thinking the term meant that the work had to be humorous, like a sniglet. I've got a whole book of 100s (Humans, Being- A Story a Day for a Year) and the person helping me get it on Amazon asked me if I wanted Drabble as a keyword. I declined. Your story is one of the best 100s I've seen in a long time.
There is something magnetically powerful in this story. but I cannot work it out. the first part is so literal the second so dreamlike and surreal. Has he transformed into a bird? why would his mother wish to scare him off with a spoon and pot? is this a reference to the Chinese disasterous war against the sparrows that led to famine? did he just dream he was a bird because he ate the egg. and didn't you write something much longer and darker about eggs and knives...
Nice plot development here is so few words, and the way you've written this story, it makes the reader go back and review it a few times to truly get the meaning. Very well done! I see why this won!
Thank you! I'm happy that you enjoyed my story. It means a lot to me to receive these comments! <3
Wow, great job. It's been a minute since I've read a drabble..
Thank you, Tiffany! <3
Awesome! This is a very poignant piece.
Thank you, Andrei! <3
I love that you've included a Happy Mondays video. You legend. Brilliant story but I already told you that 😎
Haha gotta throw in some Mondays for the kids now and then. Thank you for your kind words! <3
I will never stop thinking of this little story. It’s so good.
Wow. Thank you, Kait! That makes my day.
I hate the term drabble (always have) but I really like the story. Great example of what can be accomplished in a microfiction with some effort and imagination.
Ha! What about the term do you dislike?
Thank you, Jimmy. I appreciate you reading my story! <3
I remember back in the Medium days people thinking the term meant that the work had to be humorous, like a sniglet. I've got a whole book of 100s (Humans, Being- A Story a Day for a Year) and the person helping me get it on Amazon asked me if I wanted Drabble as a keyword. I declined. Your story is one of the best 100s I've seen in a long time.
Wow. That means a lot to me, Jimmy. Thank you. I can see why you've avoided using the word Drabble based on that.
Great little piece Sean. Congratulations on the win!
Thanks, Angela! I appreciate it!
Congratulations Sean. This is definitely an excellent microfiction. The ending is really fantastic.
You'll make me blush! <3
So much in so little. A bit like an egg. Congrats on the well-deserved win!!!!!!
Thank you! <3 It was a fun challenge! 😅
Well deserved sir.
Thank you, Clancy! Something tells me these kids rode the bus to school. ;)
There is something magnetically powerful in this story. but I cannot work it out. the first part is so literal the second so dreamlike and surreal. Has he transformed into a bird? why would his mother wish to scare him off with a spoon and pot? is this a reference to the Chinese disasterous war against the sparrows that led to famine? did he just dream he was a bird because he ate the egg. and didn't you write something much longer and darker about eggs and knives...
Hi, I'm pretty new to Substack. I got your email. Thanks.
I love reading that. Thank you for the kind words!