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brielle's avatar

wow very intense and also such good political commentary...not sure if it was intended as such but it packs a punch

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

❤️ Thank you, Bri!

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P.K Daze's avatar

there is nothing more horrifying than real life

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

A sad fact. Thanks for reading! ❤️

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Will Boucher's avatar

yes yes yes, this was a super creepy read. That first paragraph hit me from the get go--I once came across a man who died in his front lawn when I was walking my dog. For the days after that, I'd see his face every time I closed my eyes.

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Oh man! That's nuts! Did you have to call 911? Or did you go up to the house? Sorry, I'm just really curious how that played out. Yikes.

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Will Boucher's avatar

It was nuts. I walked up to him and it was clear he was dead. Got on the phone with 911. As I called them, his daughter ran out of the house and started doing CPR but he was gone. Then I waited until the medics showed up

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

How tragic!

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William Pauley III's avatar

Oh, man... this was dark. You nailed the tone. Nicely done! Paired well with the black coffee I was sipping on as I read it. ☕️

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

❤️

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A. R. Eldridge's avatar

Great stuff man. Really chilling, icky imagery with the bugs.

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Wendy Cockcroft's avatar

This is excellent! I love the way the haunting is made manifest in the kid's efforts to escape it. Great job!

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

What a lovely comment to read first thing in the morning. Thank you! ❤️

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Ken Flyingheart's avatar

Man. Dark and real. I love the prose, dense and snappy. But this energy, raw and appalled... this is horror. For real. Tremendous work, Sean!

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Thanks, Ken. Yeah man, this one was hard to write. It sorta messed me up. It's the darkest thing I've written for sure.

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Ken Flyingheart's avatar

Felt it. The emotional current here is a live wire. But it's good it's there. It says a lot about you and it makes for good writing and reading, even if it's not light fare. It kinda brings to mind that Ellison short from Deadbird Stories, where he uses the Kitty Genovese situation. Which is relevant af, right now. The rage and incomprehension that drips from that piece is similar. Mark of a good soul. Mark of a good writer.

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Emily S Hurricane's avatar

Wowwww. 👏👏👏

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Thank you, Emily! ❤️❤️

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Stephen Duffy's avatar

Great work, Sean. Horrible though - was it based on something you'd seen yourself? Think we've all seen images online that we wish we could unsee.

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Hanna Delaney's avatar

Christ, this was such powerful message. I've been waiting to get a good moment to savour this and I wasn't disappointed. I really enjoyed it, Sean.

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Thank you, Hanna! That means a lot to me. It was a hard one to write.

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Jon T's avatar

I feel icky now. Thank you. Great affect this one.

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Edith Bow's avatar

Wow that was fucking amazing. I am so glad I found this one.

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Edith, that makes me so happy. I just read your work and that means a lot coming from such a great writer.

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Edith Bow's avatar

Thank you, as a former bay area person to another (why are you so expensive Cali?) it's wonderful to see others out in the world doing the work. Your craft is delightful. Never stop.

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Caro Henry's avatar

Wow! This is truly horrifyingly good! Very nicely done!

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Thank you, Caro! ❤️

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Swamp Ruby's avatar

Jesus. very well done.

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Thank you! I appreciate you reading and leaving a comment! ❤️

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Nicole Paton's avatar

Oh wow, this is so good - I really wasn't expecting that ending.

Kendra's right - kids die all the time, and nobody really says anything about it.

This really smacked me in the face.

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Thanks, Nicole! ❤️ It was a hard one to write.

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D. C. Wilkinson's avatar

Good job, Sean. Perfectly creepy. I enjoyed reading this.

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Thank you, D.C.! I appreciate that! ❤️

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